Do you ever feel that there is something holding you back in your relationship, your career, your dreams and your aspirations? More than likely it’s yourself. So today I just first of all want to tell you to “get out of your way”.

So many times in our relationships we can find ourselves getting in our own way. We know exactly what we want and we know what we don’t want, but we are constantly over thinking and over analyzing our journey of how to get there, and as a result we are putting ourselves in our own way. Normally this is because of fear, it could be that we are afraid of being hurt again or we are afraid of being rejected or we are simply afraid that our insecurities will be exposed. I could write a whole blog about our insecurities and what they are and why we fear particular things or I could write a whole blog on the pressure that society puts on us to perform and look a particular way but what I would like to do is for us to move out of our own way and move forward. So I’m going to get you to ask yourself three questions and then ask yourself how are they affecting these three key areas in your life.

-Your Relationships

-Your Career

-Your Dreams


1- What do I really want?

2- Am I doing everything in my power to achieve it?

3- Is what I am doing now taking me closer to what I want?

If you have answered these three questions honestly, this should begin to bring some clarity to your circumstances and situations and also allow you to be able to clearly decide what you need to do next. I encourage you to write these answers down on a piece of paper or journal it and revisit your answers once a week for one month. This will put a burning desire within you to drive you towards what you want or a burning desire to want to change your situation.

If you feel comfortable share your answers below.

The 7 most important things you will find in relationships. Relationships can be absolutely amazing when love and respect is shown daily. They certainly have their ups and downs, they have their hardships and rewards (there’s no sugar coating it) but mostly; together, you are a team. If you come at it that way, you can overcome most things that life will throw at you. 

1. Commitment. Along with good times in relationships, also come some hard times. It’s two people that have come together to share their lives. You have to remember to respect each other’s differences. That goes for opinions right through to hobbies. It will not, and cannot always be smooth sailings, but it’s the way you come through it and handle it together as a team that matters. 

2. Communication, Honesty and Trust. I believe these to be the three biggest and strongest foundations of any good relationship. You need to feel comfortable speaking up about things that are important (listen to your heart), and you should make your partner feel the same. That goes for the good stuff too, if you feel it, say it. You need to instill trust in your partner, that’s why you have committed to dating them, and that goes both ways.  These three key foundations should help eliminate insecurities, obsessing, analysing and over-thinking. 

3. Show appreciation. Be open, giving and showing kindness. Don’t expect everything, (it’s really amazing when your partner does something romantic or kind for you) but you should never come from a place of expecting it. Think about them also, do romantic and nice things for them also. It’s not all about you, like it’s not all about them either.  You need to look after your partner and care for them, and choose someone that does the same for you. Be interested in what they like, want, their dreams, plans, goals etc. 

4. Humour. Make each other laugh. It is so amazing and important to have good laughs with your partner. Everyone loves a bit of banter.

5. Misdirect emotions, thoughts and past occurences. Don’t take past relationships that didn’t work out, out on your partner. We have all been hurt and have learnt lessons from our experiences, but if something is triggered in you be honest with your partner, it is not entirely their fault, it’s something you need to overcome. Speaking about it together can help, but know that you can’t stew over it or blame them. 

6. Understanding. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes, often. If you have done something your partner isn’t happy about, roll reverse in your mind. If your partner did that to you, how would you feel? (Honestly).. that sheds some pretty darn good light on the situation and will make you clearer on how to handle it. 

7. Independence. You have a life outside of your relationship, just as you have a life outside of your work. Make time for your friends, families, social events, work events, hobbies, dreams etc. Surely your partner can be invited whenever and wherever but ensure you never lose sight of what ELSE is important in your world.

Rose. P