The 7 most important things you will find in relationships. Relationships can be absolutely amazing when love and respect is shown daily. They certainly have their ups and downs, they have their hardships and rewards (there’s no sugar coating it) but mostly; together, you are a team. If you come at it that way, you can overcome most things that life will throw at you. 

1. Commitment. Along with good times in relationships, also come some hard times. It’s two people that have come together to share their lives. You have to remember to respect each other’s differences. That goes for opinions right through to hobbies. It will not, and cannot always be smooth sailings, but it’s the way you come through it and handle it together as a team that matters. 

2. Communication, Honesty and Trust. I believe these to be the three biggest and strongest foundations of any good relationship. You need to feel comfortable speaking up about things that are important (listen to your heart), and you should make your partner feel the same. That goes for the good stuff too, if you feel it, say it. You need to instill trust in your partner, that’s why you have committed to dating them, and that goes both ways.  These three key foundations should help eliminate insecurities, obsessing, analysing and over-thinking. 

3. Show appreciation. Be open, giving and showing kindness. Don’t expect everything, (it’s really amazing when your partner does something romantic or kind for you) but you should never come from a place of expecting it. Think about them also, do romantic and nice things for them also. It’s not all about you, like it’s not all about them either.  You need to look after your partner and care for them, and choose someone that does the same for you. Be interested in what they like, want, their dreams, plans, goals etc. 

4. Humour. Make each other laugh. It is so amazing and important to have good laughs with your partner. Everyone loves a bit of banter.

5. Misdirect emotions, thoughts and past occurences. Don’t take past relationships that didn’t work out, out on your partner. We have all been hurt and have learnt lessons from our experiences, but if something is triggered in you be honest with your partner, it is not entirely their fault, it’s something you need to overcome. Speaking about it together can help, but know that you can’t stew over it or blame them. 

6. Understanding. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes, often. If you have done something your partner isn’t happy about, roll reverse in your mind. If your partner did that to you, how would you feel? (Honestly).. that sheds some pretty darn good light on the situation and will make you clearer on how to handle it. 

7. Independence. You have a life outside of your relationship, just as you have a life outside of your work. Make time for your friends, families, social events, work events, hobbies, dreams etc. Surely your partner can be invited whenever and wherever but ensure you never lose sight of what ELSE is important in your world.

Rose. P